For better and worse, we are all at least partially driven by a desire to look good to others, or to at least avoid looking bad. Because they trust and respect you, your clients are dying to look good to you.
You can turn that desire into focus and achievement.
When your clients express a desire to accomplish this or that, challenge them to make a plan to do so. Have them break it down into steps, set a date, give their word to actually making it happen.
Then, most importantly, let them know you’re excited to see them follow through on that. You look forward to hearing all about it and congratulating them during your next session following that date.
When you do this, you create a listening of them that what they say matters. They’ll experience that someone cares.
Nobody wants to look like a chump, and when asked how it went doing that thing we said we’d do, we’d all rather be able to say a hearty “Good!” This is much better than “I forgot”, “I was too busy”, or simply “Yeah, I didn’t do that.”
When your client follows through, make sure you’re there to recognize and celebrate as much. Let them experience looking good in your eyes, as a direct result of doing the work and getting the results they want.
When your client doesn’t follow through, make sure that’s at least a slightly awkward conversation. One that they can be with, certainly, but definitely less fun than the “yep, I did that” celebration. Do that not by twisting the knife of shame and make wrong, but by bringing a compassionate curiosity, a sort of “Wait, but why?” that implies it’s simply not a fit for who they are and what they’re capable of to come to your call so under-accomplished. You should inquire into what happened that led them to not follow through like you’d ask after why they left the house without wearing any pants.
Do these two things, and train your clients to expect as much. Tie looking good (and avoiding looking bad) to them doing the work that produces results.
